Marraige Is Not A Challenge


By; Ruth Abusakie Adjaottor

 Growing up, I fantasized a lot about how grand I will love my wedding to be in the future.

Talk of the glamour, the crowd, the frenzy and all pleasant emotions; I wanted it all. I hadn’t seen all the prospective wedding gowns there are, but I wanted a white ball gown with pearls stuck all over it. I imagined being paraded by an entourage of beautiful bridesmaids, at least six of them, with a huge crowd swimming in a pool of purple and white.

The focus was all about the wedding; never for once did I think of who is going to be the groom or anything else aside concerning the marriage. The ambition was to have a plush wedding. Close to two decades down the line and I don’t know which window the fantasies escaped through.

Thousands of people are walking down the aisle every single week and the wedding craze is just on a different level; it has become the trend which doesn’t look like it’s going to fade away with time. In some cases, it comes as a package which includes the bachelorette parties, pre-wedding photo shoots, knocking, engagement ceremonies, make up trials and the list goes on and on in no particular order.

Let’s stick to reality; most of the brides that are walked down the aisle always turn out to surprise their grooms, family and friends; thanks to the transforming power of makeup. It’s quite acceptable anyway. I mean isn’t it supposed to be relatively the ‘greatest’ day of one’s life?

I quite recall a picture of a bride who walked down the aisle without makeup found its way to the internet and people got talking about how inappropriate it seemed. I saw nothing wrong with it personally. It had me thinking if people are really about marriages or are just living the fantasies like I planned on doing when I was young.

Frankly speaking, majority are just about the glam, the public impression, and the one day perfection. People go in for loans to finance their weddings only to end up starting their family life paying debts. It’s pretty much not a bad idea to seek financial support on such occasions, but at the expense of your comfort, not so cool. Too much emphasis is being laid on the outlook of the ceremony rather than it’s significance. If you have enough money to lavish on plush weddings, fair enough.

You earned your money anyway, so you decide how you spend it. If you however must sell a tooth and an arm to make it look good, then I’m sorry to burst your bubble; you will end up like the masses; broken, devastated, wallowing in poverty and looking for the least chance to file a divorce. Why not do it right and make it last? Cut your cloak according to your size and forget about what people are going to say.

A simple ceremony never killed anyone:; you could opt to just go to the court in the company of a few loved ones and sign.

The crowd only makes it look good; it doesn’t make the marriage any better. So if you’re all about the glitz and glory, you certainly aren’t ready to go on the marriage journey. After that day; it’s going to be the two of you against the world. Let’s give reality a chance. Marriage is not a challenge!



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