We Hail Vals Day And Damn Mother’s Day!


“Just when a woman thinks her work is done, she becomes a grandmother.”
– The Church Mouse

Every year, around this time, we celebrate Mother’s Day. How many of us really mean it when we call our mothers on the phone and say “I love you mum”? I guess what they really need from us is just to say “thank you”, Why? Because we have abused those three letter words, we use them at will without any feelings and meaning.

Mom, let me first say, thank you for always being there for me. It goes without saying that I have made many mistakes in my short years on earth, and yet not one of them made you mad enough to ever walk away.

I believe your presence is something I have sometimes taken for granted. Now, as I live on my own, I realize how much I miss you. Of course, I still talk to you as often as time allows me to, but it is just the unannounced peace that comes with you being around- I miss that dearly.

On that same note, thank you for always being willing to listen to the unnecessary, drawn-out stories and how unfair life has been to me sometimes, though boring you still listen and encourage me.

Thank you for always being there for me, for crying and laughing with me, and sometimes just sitting with me, as you always knew exactly what was needed.

February 14 every year is marked and celebrated as ‘St Valentine’s Day’. At the beginning of the year, every man, every woman, anxiously, and with bated breath, waits for Valentine’s Day to express his or her love to a dear one. The shops and the gift vouchers are not left out; the restaurants and the hotels get busy on that day as people make orders and book in.

On Valentine’s Day, the radio stations run promotions, and dedicate the whole day’s programmes. Prior to that, a week or two to Valentine’s Day, the airwaves are inundated with programmes and jingles of Valentine’s Day running until the D-day.

Can the same be said of Mother’s Day? The answer is a big no.

“A mother is a person who, seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.”
– Tenneva Jordan

The façade and the hullabaloo surrounding the Valentine’s Day quickly dies after the celebrations, and what follows is disappointment and quarrels; guess what? We all run to our mothers to seek comfort, protection and advice.

They selflessly share what they have without considering themselves. A mother would not sleep until she is fully aware and convinced that her kids are asleep; they would not eat until they are convinced that the children are satisfied. But how do we pay them back, with disdain and scorn.

The ladies of today who are trying desperately to separate us from our mothers forget that they are also mothers in the making, and that the way things are going and society is losing touch with reality all in the name of modernization and advancement, will affect society and how we view our mothers.

Growing up, one of my favourite songs was Paapa Yankson’s, “If you find your mother and your wife being taken by water, who will you save? Your mother or your wife?”

I bet the way things are now, no man will hesitate for a second to save his wife. I am not saying for a moment that our wives and girlfriends are not important in our life’s. I am simply drawing an analogy to support my assertion and belief that, our mothers are becoming second fiddle to our wives and girlfriends.

Women, they say, are their own enemies. How true is this maxim, and why is it so? The answer lies with the women.

How many of us took our mothers out last year, gave them a treat for having carried us for nine months under very uncompromising circumstances, when our fathers were nowhere to be found, either having fun with friends or the useless ones in bed somewhere with another lady.

How many single mothers do we have today? A lot of them have either lost their husbands through death or divorce. In some parts of the country,
women are the breadwinners of the family, whiles the men only sit under trees, playing draft and gossiping.

Our mothers had to endure the scorching sun to put food on the table and ensure that our school fees are paid; the comfort that they don’t wish for themselves, they wish for us.

How many of them even live to see us make it in life? After all the sacrifices, they die. So if your mother and mine are alive today, we should be able to say thank you, if not for carrying us for nine months, but just for the fact that they are alive.

“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you.” – The Bible, Exodus 20:12

How well do we honour our parents? It is for a good reason that God, in his infinite wisdom, said if one ever wishes to enter heaven, which we so much believe in, for which reason we troop to the churches on Sunday and to the mosque on Fridays as well as to our temples wherever one worships, we should honour our parents.

The hypocrisy of it last year was for me to log on facebook, a social networking site, to realise that a lot of people have sent messages to their mothers via facebook. How many mothers go on facebook on Mother’s Day ? Was it to show appreciation or a showoff?

Mothers deserve more than internet love, which they end up not seeing. What is surprising is that, nobody expresses his or her feeling to the boyfriend or girlfriend on facebook on Valentine’s Day, yet they find it convenient to do that for their mothers who won’t see it anyway.

God could not be everywhere at every time to attend to every problem, so he made mothers. So it is believed that God created women in his image. Their compassion, forgiving heart etc, are but the few attributes that give credence to this assertion.

We have all manners of holidays, but not one for mothers. Go to workplaces, and visit our campuses on Val’s Day, and all you see is red everywhere. Workers even close early on Valentine’s Day to go home and spend some time with loved ones, but Mother’s Day comes and goes without any fanfare and notice.

Thank you mom for repeating the same advice over and over, even when I didn’t listen the first time. Your patience despite my stubbornness was a true display that you never held grudges.

Thank you for always encouraging me to be myself in a world that tries desperately to make us all the same. You always said, “Be yourself because everybody else is taken”.

Thank you for forcing me to confront a few people in my life. You helped me realize that confrontation and transparency are both healthy and necessary. If we never stand up for ourselves, we shorthand the One who made us.

Thank you for sacrificing your time, your sleep, your peace of mind, your sanity, your money, your life- your everything- so that you could be the best mother every child will wish for.

You have absolutely no idea, nor will you ever be able to understand, how much you mean to me mom.

“My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever saw. All I am I owe to my mother. I attribute all my success in life to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from her.”
– George Washington

George Washington has said it all.

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